I bought my angel on the Fourth of July
I didn't plan it, it just happend that way.
I guess faith stepped in in the end,
'Cause I needed him then.

When I bought him they said, Are you sure?
No refunds, returns or exchanges because
once he's yours, he's yours for good.
Now, you behave like an angel should.

'Cause I saw it on TV,
they were selling pieces of heaven
and I thought, Hey, what about me?
When am I considered... ooh

I chained my angel to the eavestrough
It was November and I think I pissed him off
He's mad but I don't care
You're my Angel, so there.

I figure it's only about sixty more years
So come on Angel, stop all the tears
Come sing me a song or two
Whatever it is you Angels do.

'Cause I saw it on TV
They were selling pieces of heaven
And I thought, Hey what about me?
When can I make reservations.. ooh

My pet angel's got a long lost friend.
He says he's coming back when the world ends
when us humans have lost our touch...
God never liked people that much

'Cause he saw it on TV
they were selling pieces of heaven
and he thought, Well, how can this be?
What in the Hell are they thinking?