Obey the Lord of this Magic Mushroom Kingdom
Hey, Mario, you're gonna fucking die
Come with me back in time, come with me back to 1989

Mario's mustache tickles Luigi's asshole
Two Italians in an Asian world, eating spaghetti with cat meatballs
Jump up and squash a Goomba, fuck that, give me firepower

Blowing in the cartridge, this fucking piece of shit still won't fucking work
Bought it from a tag sale, you fucking dicks, I want my dollar back
Blowing in the system, what kind of bullshit is this anyway?
The controller is all sticky now, I should have never put those fucking stickers on it

The Mario and Duck Hunt game
Nothing beats it still to this day
I just want to shoot that goddamn dog
Motherfucker, don't you laugh at me
The ducks must be smoking crack
I'm three inches from the screen
Still missing

Bow your head down when before the Lord
Has that mushroom gone straight to your head?
(Mario) HAIL King Bowser
Thay're gonna find you in a pipe, smushed up dead

I'm dodging fireballs in this lava pool
Where is that fucking bitch, Princess Toadstool?
Thank you, Mario, but our princess is in another castle
Find Princess Toadstool, bring her to me
More than a kiss, get down on your knees

I must be re-ta-tarded to write a song about this shit

Bullet Bill and the turtles with wings
The Cheap-Cheaps and fucking squid things
Hammer Bros. got the target on your balls
And they castrate Mario for breaking Koopa's laws
No more continues, no option to save
Auggghhhhh!!!!!
Game over